Oh my gosh. Jesus.
— Carla
Don’t worry: The water on the floor is tears.
— Éa
**Sullivan: **Yeah, even Mimi’s inflatable balls are giant!
[LAUGHTER]
Put that on Familypants, Dad!
Scott: I’m not sure that I will…
If I’m ever going to become a successful scientist, I’m going to need less hair.
— Sullivan
upon seeing Neighbor Dave at his retirement party at The Tavern…
Scott: Do you know what retirement means?
Ea: Yeah! It means giving up.
Carla [complaining that her coffee tastes bad when she is sick]: You don’t know because you forget all negative experiences.
Scott: Actually, I don’t have any negative experiences.
Sullivan: Mom, come look at my parfait!
Carla: Oh, cute! It’s like a happy face.
Sullivan: Well, I was trying to make it look like a icosahedron.
[after Éa enters the room having found a book that had been lost for a year and half]
Carla: Oh, Éa, where did you find it?! Éa: It was where all the lost books are: in a responsible place! 📚
Éa: So when I was on my way home from the park, and old man and an old woman were walking on the path and they said, “Are you all by yourself?” So I told them, “Um, no my mom said my brother and I could go to the park and she’s just right over there,” and I pointed to my house.
Carla: But I didn’t know you were going to the park. You didn’t tell me.
Éa: I know. It was just the easiest way to get a worried old man and and old woman out of my way.
What could be better than co-ambulation with your mother?
— Scott, suggesting to Carla that she join Sullivan on a midday walk
You’re more helpful than a rabid dog!
— Sullivan, thanking a friend who was helping clean up
Éa: I really like Country Inn & Suits [sic].
Scott: Oh, what do you like about it?
Éa: It has pools. It has Mimi and Grandpa sometimes.
Even though my feet ache, I’m still gonna rock and shake!
— Éa, in the middle of a marathon of energetic dancing at Megan’s wedding
I feel better dancing when I’m on a precarious rock wall.
— Sullivan, explaining why he was dancing all by himself on a rock wall outside the tent at Megan’s wedding
One thing that pleases me—well, two: First, Mommy and Daddy snuggles. And second, rock dust on my hands.
— Sullivan
I’m ashamed to say this for my gender, but men sweat 40% more than women.
— Sullivan, responding to Lucy after she pointed out a sweaty jogger while they both rode in the car to her house
Wait, you want me to dance self-consciously? Isn’t that a contradiction of terms?
— Scott
Scott: Are any of my accents good?
Éa: Well, I don’t like them, so I don’t know.
My favorite thing is to make that piano reveberate [sic] like an explosive bāss violin.
— Sullivan, pronouncing “bass” like the fish, explaining what he loves about playing his new instrument
No, no, no, your ridicule is quite powerful. I appreciate it, actually.
— Scott, to Carla
Scott: Oh, Carla, you don’t get cranky.
Carla: No, but I do get honest.
Hey, Mom, I don’t know what would be worse: getting punched on the back of your head and falling on your face, or getting punched in the face and falling on the back of your head.
— Sullivan, breaking several minutes of in-car silence at 10 PM on a road trip to Pittsburgh
Carla: What were you dreaming about, Sully?
Sullivan: Different metals that are essential to life.
Carla: Oh! What metals are essential to life?
Sullivan: Well, I wasn’t really dreaming about the names. I was dreaming about their colors and crystal habits.
**Donna: ** Sullivan’s mom would volunteer [in the library] for a Tuesday, but would need to bring Sullivan’s sister. Is that okay?
Mardi: Yep! If she’s anything like Sullivan, she could probably help out too!
Donna: We are a go!
Scott: So, Sullivan what laws of physics do you know?
Sullivan: Newton’s laws of physics!
Éa: Nudists know all physics?