It was a pleasure today to select recordings from which to make custom ringtones for when Sullivan and Éa call me. (I’ve been using “Whistle Stop” from Disney’s Robin Hood for Carla for years.) Éa even advised me on my selection for her, suggesting the winner (the first twenty-nine seconds of “Mrs. Robinson” by Simon & Garfunkel. For Sullivan, I chose the first thirty seconds of Quincy Jones’ “Soul Bossa Nova,” signifying his easygoing demeanor and his prioritizing enjoyment.
(a phone call while Carla, Éa, and Scott are away for the weekend soccer tournament):
Carla: Hi, Honey! What’s up?
Sullivan, 16: Hi, Mom. Where’s the alcohol?
Scott: Hey, no pointing. It makes me nervous.
Sullivan: I wasn’t pointing. I was air-rubbing your teeth.
Sullivan said yesterday that every conversation with me feels like an argument. That’s the sort of comment that prompts change in me, I hope!
“Since all his visits were beneficial, his step or holler through a doorway got a bright welcome“ (Toni Morrison, of her character Stamp Paid in Beloved).
I’m very rarely Stamp Paid with Sullivan. I need to change.
While reading the Cheerios box, Sullivan stops and says, “Mom, what’s cancer?” Carla replies that it’s a sickness that kills a lot of people and that Cheerios is trying to raise money to help fund research to find a cure. In turn, Sullivan says, “Yeah, because pink doesn’t really work, right?” Confused, Carla asks, “What?” Sullivan replies slyly as if telling her something that only a few select people know, “Liiiike, people wear those pink shoes and gloves…but it doesn’t really cure their cancer.”
Carla: Except for Sully. He’s from Venus.
Sullivan: Are you saying beautiful and normally portrayed to non-school groups as naked?
For Christmas, can I have socks? Like, thirty socks. And wrap them all in cash.
— Sullivan
I somehow sneezed up my shorts!
— Sullivan
The nice thing about an airship is that you don’t need a garage.
— Sullivan
You know, whoever came up with the term ‘dad jokes’ has clearly never met my mother.
— Sullivan
Man, that piccolo really makes your biceps pop!
— Sullivan
Oh, that? That’s just smooth jazz. Nothing to worry about.
— Sullivan, replying to an inquiry over his headset while playing Minecraft one night
My new motto is: “Live every day like it’s your last.” And no, that does not mean find a hospital, go there, find a room and lay down, eyes twitching…
— Sullivan
The problem with being an adolescent is that when you go to rub your beard, you end up pinching yourself.
— Sullivan
Éa: What’s a placenta?
Sullivan: What!? You don’t know what a placenta is? Mom, we have failed.
[overheard while Sullivan and Éa build a precarious fort]:
Éa: Sully, did you just swear!?
Sullivan: What!? No!
Éa: No really, Sully, did you say the S word?
Sullivan: No! Only Mom does that!
Today, watching a fan while I was supposed to listening in math class, I figured out how servo motors work.
— Sullivan
“It’s disturbing how many people bring knives on dates.”
— Sullivan, reflecting on romantic carvings in the wooden observatory deck on the Bog Trail at Black Moshannon
“I also have some lead. I want to mail it to my Aunt Joanna in California and see how she reacts.”
— Sullivan, showing off his elements collection
Sullivan: Mom, can you snuggle me?
Carla: I already snuggled you.
Sullivan: But that one didn’t take.
Sullivan: Yeah, even Mimi’s inflatable balls are giant! [LAUGHTER] Put that on Familypants, Dad!
Scott: I’m not sure that I will…
If I’m ever going to become a successful scientist, I’m going to need less hair.
— Sullivan
[five minutes after bedtime lights out]
Sullivan: Mom?
Carla: Yes?! [long pause]
Sullivan: Why, when, or how did burritos originate?
Sullivan: Mom, come look at my parfait!
Carla: Oh, cute! It’s like a happy face.
Sullivan: Well, I was trying to make it look like a icosahedron.