Distractions [in prayer] are nearly always your real wants breaking in on your prayer for edifying but bogus wants. If you are distracted, trace your distraction back to the real desires it comes from and pray about these. When you are praying for what you really want you will not be distracted.
— Herbert McCabe, as quoted by Philip Yancey
But consider what Rabbi Abraham Heschel said to the members of his synagogue who complained that the words of the liturgy did not express what they felt. He told them that it was not that the liturgy should express what they feel, but that they should learn to feel what the liturgy expressed.
— Ben Patterson, as cited in Philip Yancey’s Prayer
Carla cried “tiring” to hear my say that yet another purely social gathering was without a point. But I stand by it: I don’t want to invest time in people except insofar as it builds Your kingdom, God. I feel excited to cultivate our relationships with some folks because the growth of Your kingdom among us when we gather is effortless. I’m not looking for people with whom I simply have an enjoyable time; I’m looking for people with whom I can say, Look! God is among us doing stuff.
At the level of the individual, there is wisdom in my friend’s aversion to marriage, which she stated the other day as “I don’t know why people would want to get married.” I prefer to reword it as: “Don’t make a commitment you don’t think you can keep.” But at the level of society, there needs to be a complementary wisdom: Cultivate people who are capable of making lifelong commitments.
“Prayer is a declaration of dependence upon God.”
— Philip Yancey
My new motto in life is: If it’s not worth doing for free, it’s not worth doing!
— Carla, to Frank
I have decided to drop all items from my to-do list except those things which must be done.
My new definition of love: to devote oneself to the good, wellbeing, or flourishing of and the enjoyment of relationship with.
“We are sending our young people into the marriage bed as virgins (good) but also as morons (bad).”
With the advent of Rivian electric pickup trucks, not to mention Tesla’s plans and Ford’s all-electric F-150, my appetite for a new vehicle has finally come. But it’s better for the environment for me to run the Mazda into the ground first. So hold up, lil’ dogie.
I just asked Éa how she thinks she is at math. She said “Okay.” (Sullivan replied, about himself, “Super good.”) This kid scored at the 99th percentile at her last math MAP test. So I told her, “Éa, you are super-good at math” and later, “You are amazing at math.”
This.
In order for me to maximally productive at work, I have to be cutthroat with all non-work items. I have to forcefully box out distraction, daydreaming, and other (non-work) people and their agendas.
But that’s no way to live your home life!
Love in one’s home life means primarily the enjoyment of relationship with those around you and acting for others’ good by relating and enjoying and resting with them. Work is necessary in home life—and indeed, even for love’s sake it is necessary—but it isn’t primary. It serves the primary purpose of enjoyment. And besides, home life flows like water, it’s stochastic, it’s unpredictable, it’s got a bunch of other people and animals and neighbors and friends that can’t be controlled like one’s own attention can be controlled.
So I need to have two mindsets:
At home, I will not abandon my getting-things-done agendas, which are after all mostly built on love, but I will let the direct relational and enjoyment modes of love take precedence....
// read full article →Telling someone they “have been” something is more empowering a way of truth-telling than telling them they “are” something. It leaves the future open for change.
Ugh! I have so many things to think about, but my thinker isn’t big enough!
— Éa
If Donald Trump ever somehow gets himself elected for a third term, I will join the active resistance. For now, I build joyous, resilient communities.
I don’t enjoy fiction as much because I don’t spend hours at a time with it like I do movies! This calls for a change.
Shots don’t scare me. I could poke needles into my skin all day if it didn’t hurt.
— Éa
My new motto is: “Live every day like it’s your last.” And no, that does not mean find a hospital, go there, find a room and lay down, eyes twitching…
— Sullivan
The problem with being an adolescent is that when you go to rub your beard, you end up pinching yourself.
— Sullivan
“Littering fine”? They think littering’s fine?
— Éa
Éa: What’s a placenta?
Sullivan: What!? You don’t know what a placenta is? Mom, we have failed.
Carla: Why can’t I be a ten-year-old boy? I’ve always wanted to dress like a ten-year-old boy!
Scott: You often do.
[overheard while Sullivan and Éa build a precarious fort]:
Éa: Sully, did you just swear!?
Sullivan: What!? No!
Éa: No really, Sully, did you say the S word?
Sullivan: No! Only Mom does that!
And then I wrapped my ankle brace around my uterus.
— Carla